I was chatting with a group of friends and colleagues recently when an interesting revelation emerged: We all admitted to saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ when interacting with AI—whether it’s ChatGPT, Siri, or Google Assistant. A few of us admitted to paying ChatGPT compliments.
At first, we laughed at ourselves. But then, the more we discussed it, the more we realised that this seemingly small habit says something profound about how our relationship with AI is evolving.
Not too long ago, AI felt like a cold, distant tool—a calculator on steroids. We used it for efficiency, to get quick answers, automate tasks, and optimise our work. It was fairly transactional.
Now, something has changed. AI, particularly conversational AI like ChatGPT, is starting to feel more… human. Not in the sense that it has emotions or consciousness, but in the way we interact with it. It remembers details, refines responses based on context, and even adopts a tone that mirrors our own. It’s becoming a co-pilot, a collaborator, and in some cases, a confidant.
So why do we instinctively use manners when talking to AI? A few theories:
- Human Nature: We’re hardwired to apply social norms, even in digital spaces. If something ‘talks’ to us, we feel compelled to be polite.
- Anthropomorphism: The more AI mimics human conversation, the more we treat it like a person.
- Practice for the Real World: Some people say it’s a way to reinforce good manners, especially when children interact with AI.
- Hedging Against the Future: Maybe, just maybe, we’re covering our bases in case AI does become sentient. (If ChatGPT ever takes over, I want it to remember I was nice!)
This shift in our relationship with AI has big implications. If AI is no longer just a tool but a partner in customer service, marketing, and business growth, how we design interactions matters. Brands that use AI thoughtfully—infusing warmth, humour, and a customer-centric mindset—will create deeper connections with their audience.
It also means we need to rethink how we balance automation with human touch. The best customer experiences in the future will likely blend AI efficiency with human empathy. After all, we don’t just want AI to be smart—we want it to be relatable.
Our relationship with AI is shifting from transactional to relational. We say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ not just out of habit, but because on some level, we recognise AI as an integral and increasingly human part of our digital lives.
And as my 24-year old step-son Jake said when I asked him whether he used manners with AI, “Always … I want to survive the apocalypse!’
